My Husband "Subvet" says that when our first son "Sonshine" was born the sun rose on our world, when our second son "Gator" was born the sun laughed and when our daughter "Sugars" was born all the flowers bloomed. That says it all.

"Life is not about waiting for the storms to pass...
It's about learning how to dance in the rain."
Anonymous

Your mind is the garden, your
thoughts are the seeds, the harvest can either be flowers or weeds. — William
Wordsworth

Sunday, August 31, 2008

Mandatory Group Therapy on the Med/Surg Floor

WARNING...WORK RANT AHEAD

Lesson 1:
I am a Nurse, not your dealer. If you need Dilaudid, Phenergan, Ativan AND Benadryl each 10 minutes BEFORE they're ordered to be given by the MD, spaced out so that you're getting something every hour..on the hour, YOU ARE AN ADDICT. Seek Help (elsewhere).

Lesson 2:
My WWII vet's chest pain is MORE IMPORTANT than your need for Dilaudid, Phenergan, Ativan and Benadryl. WAIT YOUR TURN.

Lesson 3:
My OTHER WWII vet's broken (and unfixable) hip is being aggravated by his Restless Leg Syndrome that's causing involuntary and jerky movements to that leg. He hasn't called me for a second Vicodin even though it's 30 min PAST the time he could have it, and it's the only medicine he's taken. I only found out he's hurting cause I went and checked on him. You could learn a lot from him.

Lesson 4:
When I tell you that you're not going to get the "rush" from the Dilaudid I just gave you because I pushed it very slowly after I'd dilluted it and you continue to ask me REPEATEDLY if it went in/if I'm going to redose it because you "didn't feel it". Don't then lament on how you DON'T get a rush from/aren't just aking for more Dilaudid. I'M NOT STUPID.

Lesson 5:
When I have 6 patients with 6 different reasons for being in the hospital, 4 of them involving surgeries/wounds, 1 chest pain and your "esophagitis". Don't expect me to stay in your room all night long pushing meds, then 'chatting'. I'm not your new found best friend. You're high on Dilaudid and should I by some strange occurance have free time....I'd rather see what knowlege I can glean from my 2 WWII vets down the hall from you. I mean after all...Mr Broken Hip was a fighter mechanic in the Navy for 20 years...AFTER serving 4 in the Air Force. He loaded bombs onto fighters without knowing they were training the drop and flee maneuver. If I have time to talk...I want to talk PLANES!!

Lesson 6:
It is 2 o'clock IN THE MORNING. Go..To..Sleep.

Thank you and good night.

8 comments:

Diane@Diane's Place said...

Remind me to do my best to stay on your good side. And never fear, even if I AM hurting I'll just suffer in silence. ;o)

Hope the rest of your evening/night/morning goes better than the first portion.

And I WILL be going to bed very soon, Nurse Goodbody. ;o)

Love and very careful hugs,

Diane

Stephanie D. said...

Hear, HEAR!

Welcome to the world of adulthood nursing.

And don't tell me--he probably gets disability, too, doesn't he?

Stephanie D. said...

Oh, and here's another one for you.

If you are a 100-pack-year smoker who still sneaks a smoke now and then and is non-compliant with your CPAP at home, do not get irritated with the respiratory therapist who is with a critically ill patient in ICU when you decide at 4:15am that you are ready to put on your CPAP because the doctor said you needed it.

And do not go on and on about your back pain when you won't participate in the physical therapy ordered for you.

Lucy Stern said...

I'm glad I'm not a nurse....When my husband was in the hospital, last year, I stayed with him to help him with his little needs....

PEA said...

I've always said that nurses must have more patience than anybody...I'd be strangling half my patients if I was a nurse! lol xox

Salubrina said...

i can relate. trust me, i can.

may you have blessings of peace and joy at your job.

thanks for the post.

Ativan Prescription Information said...

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I have taken for 6 years. I am 37 years old. GREAT FOR INSOMNIA......Great for Manic stages of Bi-Polar..It's really is the only drug I can take without any side effects..I cannot even take asprin without feeling it..I have OCD and have severe sensitivity to meds, this one is great.

Side Effects :
None.....Miracle drug...onset of 20/30 minutes, peak of 1 to 3 hrs...it will erase your memory if u take it in large doses...made that mistake once..Been on and off of it since 2001. I don't get addictive to it. I only take .05 2 x a day for controlling High Blood Pressure, Anxiety and IBS..I sometimes can get away with breaking the 0.5mg down into 4 equal doses.

I hope this information will be useful to others,
Craig Hannah

MightyMom said...

I'm leaving this up so the next time SOMEONE complains about the word verification I can show them WHY it's there!!

And folks, don't go asking your MD for Ativan...this comment is pure unadulterated crap.