Showing posts with label Mass Adventures. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Mass Adventures. Show all posts
Monday, May 14, 2012
Thursday, May 26, 2011
Thank You
I have had many moments of "excitement" taking my children to church.
Some of them I blogged,
some hurt to much to share.
There was the one day about a year ago that I took all 3 kids to a daily Mass by myself. As we left 4 ladies, completely independent of each other came up to me and encouraged me to keep bringing the kids! One went so far as to say, "Don't ever let anyone stop you from bringing them! You're doing the right thing!!" Honestly it was hard to take all that support, because it just emphasizes how disruptive we really were.
But it was nice to hear too.
I'm just now catching up on blog reading from Mother's Day till now. And I came across this blog post from Mother's Day that touched my heart.
Thank you Dadwithnoisykids.
And I will continue to take my kids to Mass. Because you're absolutely right. They need it, I need it, the Priest needs it, and so do the other people there too.
Some of them I blogged,
some hurt to much to share.
There was the one day about a year ago that I took all 3 kids to a daily Mass by myself. As we left 4 ladies, completely independent of each other came up to me and encouraged me to keep bringing the kids! One went so far as to say, "Don't ever let anyone stop you from bringing them! You're doing the right thing!!" Honestly it was hard to take all that support, because it just emphasizes how disruptive we really were.
But it was nice to hear too.
I'm just now catching up on blog reading from Mother's Day till now. And I came across this blog post from Mother's Day that touched my heart.
Thank you Dadwithnoisykids.
And I will continue to take my kids to Mass. Because you're absolutely right. They need it, I need it, the Priest needs it, and so do the other people there too.
Sunday, February 27, 2011
Who are you talking to?
Tonight Sonshine and I went to church together. Just the two of us. He did pretty good overall, I sang in the choir and he stayed by my side throughout the service. Mostly quietly. One of the things he did to stay out of trouble was to draw a few pictures on a little notebook I keep in my purse for just such occasions. He tore them out of the notebook and wanted to carry them to the car after church was over. He let me know he was going to hold onto them very tight because he really liked these 4 pictures. I suggested he put them in his pocket so they wouldn't blow away.
After church we went up to the director and "thanked her for letting him sing." She asked me how I was doing, if I was okay. She knew I had struggled with having him with me and was very sincere in wanting to know if I was "okay". I assured her I was doing well and we headed to the car.
Once we're in the car I hear Sonshine ask, "Are you okay? Are you OKAY??" I thought he'd either caught onto her concern for me, or was simply parroting her question so I told him: "I'm fine honey, thank you for asking."
To which he said, "I was talking to my pictures I was taking out of my pocket!!"
sure lets me know where I stand, huh?
After church we went up to the director and "thanked her for letting him sing." She asked me how I was doing, if I was okay. She knew I had struggled with having him with me and was very sincere in wanting to know if I was "okay". I assured her I was doing well and we headed to the car.
Once we're in the car I hear Sonshine ask, "Are you okay? Are you OKAY??" I thought he'd either caught onto her concern for me, or was simply parroting her question so I told him: "I'm fine honey, thank you for asking."
To which he said, "I was talking to my pictures I was taking out of my pocket!!"
sure lets me know where I stand, huh?
Sunday, January 31, 2010
very cool!
Last week, you might remember, I posted this cartoon....if you didn't watch it then watch it now so you can understand what I'm going to tell you about.....go ahead, I'll wait...
done laughing yet??
Last Sunday in Mass I handed each boy a pen and something to write on to help keep them QUIET....which did work pretty well overall.
I didn't pay a lot of attention to WHAT they were drawing so long as it was on the approved paper and not the hymnals.
until Sonshine asked me to draw him a jack-o-lantern.....which I did. Next time I looked down this is what I saw...
for some reason I don't think he was concentrating on the homily(sermon)
done laughing yet??
Last Sunday in Mass I handed each boy a pen and something to write on to help keep them QUIET....which did work pretty well overall.
I didn't pay a lot of attention to WHAT they were drawing so long as it was on the approved paper and not the hymnals.
until Sonshine asked me to draw him a jack-o-lantern.....which I did. Next time I looked down this is what I saw...
for some reason I don't think he was concentrating on the homily(sermon)
Saturday, January 2, 2010
Mass Adventures...the childless edition
Here's to cleaning out the draft section in the New Year!
I saved this blank post with just the title back in October. I thought I would do a follow up to these ....three.....posts....telling about the difference going to Mass now that the boys are in Religious Education and Sugars is in the nursery while hubby and I go to Mass alone.
I thought it would make a nice funny post about rubbing shoulders with the hubby and actually listening to the homily (sermon).
But other than the occasional observation of my fellow worshipers. I'm forced to say that Mass without hooligans is....well.....a lot less entertaining.
Without the antics of autism and the snuggles of used-to-be-toddlers-now-entering-schoolage Mass is just,.........., Mass.
There is definitely something to be said for "Be still and know that I am God." And worship is always fulfilling. But when the kids are gone there's a void. And on the rare occasion that I go to Mass alone there's a loneliness that almost hurts.
If you've ever seen the "ribbon" for autism it's a coloful puzzle.
When I had kids my life went from Black and White to Technicolor. They've colored my life, both in and outside of the lines. And there are times when being black and white can be restful to the eyes and mind. But there are also times when you miss all those colors and the picture just isn't as pretty.
I am so very grateful for my three perfect children.
They have, after all, taught me how to love, how to laugh, and yes, how to cry.
I look forward to the time when my husband and I can sit in a pew at Mass with our 3 children, their spouses and oodles of grandchildren!
Till then, I'm working on relearning how to "Be still and know that I am God."
I saved this blank post with just the title back in October. I thought I would do a follow up to these ....three.....posts....telling about the difference going to Mass now that the boys are in Religious Education and Sugars is in the nursery while hubby and I go to Mass alone.
I thought it would make a nice funny post about rubbing shoulders with the hubby and actually listening to the homily (sermon).
But other than the occasional observation of my fellow worshipers. I'm forced to say that Mass without hooligans is....well.....a lot less entertaining.
Without the antics of autism and the snuggles of used-to-be-toddlers-now-entering-schoolage Mass is just,.........., Mass.
There is definitely something to be said for "Be still and know that I am God." And worship is always fulfilling. But when the kids are gone there's a void. And on the rare occasion that I go to Mass alone there's a loneliness that almost hurts.
If you've ever seen the "ribbon" for autism it's a coloful puzzle.
When I had kids my life went from Black and White to Technicolor. They've colored my life, both in and outside of the lines. And there are times when being black and white can be restful to the eyes and mind. But there are also times when you miss all those colors and the picture just isn't as pretty.
I am so very grateful for my three perfect children.
They have, after all, taught me how to love, how to laugh, and yes, how to cry.
I look forward to the time when my husband and I can sit in a pew at Mass with our 3 children, their spouses and oodles of grandchildren!
Till then, I'm working on relearning how to "Be still and know that I am God."
Monday, November 9, 2009
Thong Thoughts
I was wondering why it seems that here lately women are content to walk around with wedgies.
I mean to tell ya, not even the discreet yank down or nuthin!
I notice this most often at church. you know with all that sit-stand-sit-stand-kneel-stand-sit going on people just don't all rise and lower at the same time and sooner or later you're bound to get a perfect view of the girl in front of you's butt....which more often than not has a healthy portion of pant or skirt material stuck up the crack.
It finally dawned on me yesterday at church....none of these wedgie women are showing pantylines....
AHA! must be wearing a thong.
Which explains why they DON'T KNOW that half their skirt is wedged up there. I mean if you've gotten used to material between your cheeks I guess a bit more or less won't bother you too much.
So, I'm officially posting a warning to all thong wearers. Please check your clothes frequently, chances are you're sporting a wedgie unawares.
I mean to tell ya, not even the discreet yank down or nuthin!
I notice this most often at church. you know with all that sit-stand-sit-stand-kneel-stand-sit going on people just don't all rise and lower at the same time and sooner or later you're bound to get a perfect view of the girl in front of you's butt....which more often than not has a healthy portion of pant or skirt material stuck up the crack.
It finally dawned on me yesterday at church....none of these wedgie women are showing pantylines....
AHA! must be wearing a thong.
Which explains why they DON'T KNOW that half their skirt is wedged up there. I mean if you've gotten used to material between your cheeks I guess a bit more or less won't bother you too much.
So, I'm officially posting a warning to all thong wearers. Please check your clothes frequently, chances are you're sporting a wedgie unawares.
Sunday, March 8, 2009
Mass Adventures, verse two
originally posted at Extraordinary Mom's Network 12/15/08
Who remembers the Hooligan Mass Adventure? Well, we have a sequel!
We’ll call this one: “How the kids behave at 8:00 AM Mass before Preschool” (on the Feast of the Immaculate Conception, which is why we went to church before school started).
For the sake of convience we went to a church that was new to us.
The Good:
We had an entire pew to ourselves. This was really good during the prayer intentions, as Sugars decided that the missilette books needed to be rearranged in the pew holder.
Every … single … one….
So each “Lord hear our prayer” found me taking a step further down the pew to keep up with her … and Sonshine moving down to stay by me. During the Gospel reading we made our way back to our starting positions as she decided that all those little books looked better in their original positions.
Just call us the Hooligan Family Pew Travelers.
The (could have been) Bad:
As is our norm Subvet carried Sugars to get in line for communion and I stayed in the pew with the boys. Before I was able to position myself between them Gator-boy went to follow Daddy and got in line too. Five people behind Dad, with Dad having no idea he was in line. Instead of going on up and getting with Dad he stood there, patiently waiting his turn……
Fortunately he looked at me and actually MINDED when I gestured for him to come back and kneel with me and Sonshine. Divine Intervention? I’d say so.
The (not really) Ugly:
There were only a few worshippers there on that early Monday morning … and no choir. It was very very quiet. I was missing the choir and realizing just how much they add to the service. Half way through everyone taking communion in silence, Sonshine must have decided that he missed the choir too … as he started singing “Twinkle Twinkle Little Star” in a lovely carrying voice.
Maybe we should start going to Mass before every Preschool day … it’d make for an interesting start to the day for sure!
Who remembers the Hooligan Mass Adventure? Well, we have a sequel!
We’ll call this one: “How the kids behave at 8:00 AM Mass before Preschool” (on the Feast of the Immaculate Conception, which is why we went to church before school started).
For the sake of convience we went to a church that was new to us.
The Good:
We had an entire pew to ourselves. This was really good during the prayer intentions, as Sugars decided that the missilette books needed to be rearranged in the pew holder.
Every … single … one….
So each “Lord hear our prayer” found me taking a step further down the pew to keep up with her … and Sonshine moving down to stay by me. During the Gospel reading we made our way back to our starting positions as she decided that all those little books looked better in their original positions.
Just call us the Hooligan Family Pew Travelers.
The (could have been) Bad:
As is our norm Subvet carried Sugars to get in line for communion and I stayed in the pew with the boys. Before I was able to position myself between them Gator-boy went to follow Daddy and got in line too. Five people behind Dad, with Dad having no idea he was in line. Instead of going on up and getting with Dad he stood there, patiently waiting his turn……
Fortunately he looked at me and actually MINDED when I gestured for him to come back and kneel with me and Sonshine. Divine Intervention? I’d say so.
The (not really) Ugly:
There were only a few worshippers there on that early Monday morning … and no choir. It was very very quiet. I was missing the choir and realizing just how much they add to the service. Half way through everyone taking communion in silence, Sonshine must have decided that he missed the choir too … as he started singing “Twinkle Twinkle Little Star” in a lovely carrying voice.
Maybe we should start going to Mass before every Preschool day … it’d make for an interesting start to the day for sure!
Monday, February 2, 2009
Mass Adventures, verse three
Here's verse 1, and verse 2.
It was a good day at Mass, which is amazing.
Hubby woke up at 2:30AM....Sugars woke at 4AM, boys woke at 5AM.
By this time we decided to go ahead and start getting ready for the 8AM Mass.
We get started off alright, except Sonshine got a bit impatient waiting for Fr Tim to begin the Mass. He was searching for the "cross and lights" which is the crucifix and candles that process in at the beginning of Mass.
Once he finally saw them mustering in the back...waiting on Father, his darling little boy voice rings out across the church with. "Come on now folks! Let's get this show on the road!"
Sugars sat on the kneeler throughout the Homily playing with my Rosary and looking adorable, dropping it on the floor...dropping it on the pew....dropping it on the floor.......
Gator happily squatted on the pew bench and read a book. Yes, squatting--feet on pew, book on knees...
All goes as well as can be expected....reasonable quietness....Sonshine even said "I'm sorry" spontaneously when he bumped his book into the lady in the pew in front of us. (my poor heart skipped a beat!).
Then we head out the door. Dad is helping to stuff Anti-FOCA postcards into all the pews so it's me vs the hooligans. Sonshine gets to the door ahead of me and stops at the little bowl holding Holy Water, sticking his finger in. To keep him from putting it in his mouth I grab his hand and help him to make a cross on his forehead with the Holy Water. He then informs me, "I got the Body and Blood of Jesus on my head Momma!"
"No," says I, "that was water, Holy Water."
"Yes Momma! I got the Body and Blood of Jesus Water on my head, and I made a CIRCLE!"
"It was a cross with Holy Water, dear....let's go get in the car!"
It was a good day at Mass, which is amazing.
Hubby woke up at 2:30AM....Sugars woke at 4AM, boys woke at 5AM.
By this time we decided to go ahead and start getting ready for the 8AM Mass.
We get started off alright, except Sonshine got a bit impatient waiting for Fr Tim to begin the Mass. He was searching for the "cross and lights" which is the crucifix and candles that process in at the beginning of Mass.
Once he finally saw them mustering in the back...waiting on Father, his darling little boy voice rings out across the church with. "Come on now folks! Let's get this show on the road!"
Sugars sat on the kneeler throughout the Homily playing with my Rosary and looking adorable, dropping it on the floor...dropping it on the pew....dropping it on the floor.......
Gator happily squatted on the pew bench and read a book. Yes, squatting--feet on pew, book on knees...
All goes as well as can be expected....reasonable quietness....Sonshine even said "I'm sorry" spontaneously when he bumped his book into the lady in the pew in front of us. (my poor heart skipped a beat!).
Then we head out the door. Dad is helping to stuff Anti-FOCA postcards into all the pews so it's me vs the hooligans. Sonshine gets to the door ahead of me and stops at the little bowl holding Holy Water, sticking his finger in. To keep him from putting it in his mouth I grab his hand and help him to make a cross on his forehead with the Holy Water. He then informs me, "I got the Body and Blood of Jesus on my head Momma!"
"No," says I, "that was water, Holy Water."
"Yes Momma! I got the Body and Blood of Jesus Water on my head, and I made a CIRCLE!"
"It was a cross with Holy Water, dear....let's go get in the car!"
Tuesday, January 13, 2009
Taking the Hooligans to Mass
this was originally posted 9/1/08 on Extraordinary Mom's Network.
Taking the Hooligans to Mass
It's quite the adventure. Let me tell you about it.
My kids all have developmental delays. Speech, socialization, physical, sensory integration, think kinda like mild autism and you'll have the right mental picture.
For starters, our church is one great big echo chamber. I’m telling you, the squeaking of my shoes echoes in there! Now, I spent 3 months trying to teach Sonshine to say “go” back when he was almost 2 and only had 4 words. I will remind myself of those 3 months of prayer and struggle to teach him to talk every 6.7 seconds from the opening of the church doors to the pulling into my driveway.
So, would you like to join us on a trip to Mass??
We go through the same thing every Sunday. It starts outside the doors with Mom announcing “We are now going into the church, this means you need to be QUIET! Do you understand?” A rousing chorus of “Yes Ma’am” a grin from Subvet and OFF… WE…… GOOOOOOO!!
Due to sleep schedules (I work nights and the kids nap) we go to the 10AM Mass…..the most crowded one…the one where if you don’t get there early enough, you’re gonna be standing in the aisles. Well, as you can imagine, trying to get through Mass without the visual and physical barriers of the pew just isn’t going to happen so we always make sure to get there early….Plus, we need to be up close so the kids can see what’s happening. This helps them stay focused and attentive (more or less). So all in all we get to church about 30 min early. Which is just about the time that the Family Rosary starts up.
Sonshine, (at a louder than normal volume) “Look Mama! It’s JESUS Mama! YEEEEESS It’s Jesus on the Cross Mama! Jesus with Booboos on the Cross Mama!!”
Mom, (in a frantic whisper) “yes dear, now we need to be quiet and take our seats come on”
Did I mention the words ECHO CHAMBER?
Everyone, (in prayerful mumble) “Hail Mary, full of grace..”
Sonshine, (in normal speaking voice…and 5 words or so behind everyone else) “Hail Mary full of grace, it's Jesus Mama!! Jesus with BooBoos!! Blessed are thou among women Mama!! I'm saying Hail Mary Mama!! and it's Jesus and GOD on the CROSS Mama!! with BooBoos!! “
Mom, (still with that frantic whisper) “very good, now say your prayers QUIETLY please”
This continues until the rosary is finished, he’s always about 4 or 5 words behind…always with interjections…always at a volume sure to make echoes in the near empty church.
He’s even learned to cross himself now…of course he does it with his left hand (not right) and smacks himself almost hard enough to leave a mark, but still!.....
Future interview with Child Protective Services—“Ma’am, your son has bruises on his forehead, shoulders and chest…” “Well, see...um…..we’re Catholic and…..um……..”
Then Mass starts.
Very early in the Mass Father Tim blesses the children and sends them to the chapel. This is good, Mom takes both boys and we join the other kiddos in our child oriented lesson. During which my 2 sons studiously attempt to unweave the wicker on the chapel seats. Raise their hands to volunteer to read the scripture (Sonshine is –at 4 years old—4 feet tall, so I have to keep saying no….sorry…they can’t read) and generally attempt to focus on whoever the teacher is that week.
I do know that Sonshine listens, even though he doesn’t appear to. For example, one day the story was about courage. One part says that it takes courage to tell your parents when you do something you shouldn’t, such as breaking a glass. Now, all during the story the boys are..um…shall we say otherwise occupied. Generally being wiggly, noisy, and distracted.
Then we rejoin Mass at the beginning of the Eucharist (Communion).
Mom, (once again) “OK boys, we’re going back into church it’s time to be quiet. If you’re not quiet we will have to leave before it’s over. Do you hear me?”
Boys, (cheerfully, with big smiles) “Yes Ma’am”
Deep breath, quick prayer…...or two….
The congregation is usually singing as the kiddos (and this mom) come back in. We get to our pew, Subvet and I exchange thumbs-ups to say that Sugars was marginally quiet during the Homily and the boys did not succeed in destroying the chairs in the chapel….this week.
We’re half way there.
We kneel, the church gets quiet as Father Tim begins the Eucharist.
Sonshine, (LOUDLY) “Look Momma!!! It’s the Body and Blood of Jesus Momma!! YEEEESS Momma! The Body and Blood of Jesus Momma! Jesus with BooBoos!! Jesus Died Momma and God put him on the cross with Booboos Momma!!!“
Mom, “yes, now be quiet or we will leave!”
Remember 3 months of begging God to allow this child to talk???
A few moments of quiet pass during which Gator-boy (y’all better pray for my sanity once he starts talking) starts getting fidgety. Out comes Momma’s purse. Some women carry makeup and wallets in their purses….I carry……..
Church appropriate (ie, quiet) entertainment. (if ever you need such items…the calculator and tape measure work the best)
Then begins the weekly wrestling match. WWF has nothing on Mightymom vs the Hooligan Duo in the pew. Trying to teach them to kneel has been a challenge, to say the least. Usually finds me with a boy on each side of me (toy in hand) on the kneeler with a handful of the backs of their pants and pull ups. This way I can “apply gentle pressure” should they decide they don’t want to kneel anymore….
(I’ve never faced the folks who sit behind us….better not to know) I will say that since we started going to Mass, my shoulders, hips and back have gotten much stronger. (It’s all about counting your blessings, folks!)
Sonshine, (when do they learn to whisper?) “Momma! You broke the glass momma!!”
Mom, “WHAT?”
Sonshine, “YEEESS! Momma! You broke the glass and was COURAGE Momma!!”
(Oh, the story book…..got it)
Mom, “ssssssshhh, it’s time to be quiet, see Daddy’s gone to get the Body and Blood of Jesus, we have to be quiet now”
Sonshine, (even louder than before) “Have to be quiet Momma! Have to be quiet and break the glass Momma! And Jesus has Booboos Momma!!!”
Mom, “hush now or we’re gonna have to leave. “
Sonshine, (WAILS) “NO Momma!! Wanna see Jesus!! Momma Wanna see the Body and Blood of Jesus!!! PPPPLLLEEEEAAASSSSEEEE!!!!”
(Oh yeah….worst mom of the year award coming my way.)
Mom, “we’re almost done. Please just hush for a few minutes”
Sonshine, “sssshhhh Momma.”
On come the announcements….Sonshine (of course) has a comment for each picture they project on the wall to go with the announcements but by this time I’ve given up and am just trying to grab up all our stuff so we can make a quick getaway. I sincerely hope the poor guy who usually sits in front of us is hard of hearing. I figure since he doesn't bust out laughing or show signs of irritation he MUST be!!
Father Tim says those blessed words “Mass has ended, you may go in peace”
We head out the door, load the clan in the van. Subvet looks at me and says “Well, we made it through another one! Shall we stop at Sonic on our way home?”
You’d better believe it! Momma needs a treat!
Thank you Dear Lord
For these precious children
For the special encounters we have with them
For the lessons they teach us.
Thank you for their ability to talk…..even when they talk too much.
Amen.
Taking the Hooligans to Mass
It's quite the adventure. Let me tell you about it.
My kids all have developmental delays. Speech, socialization, physical, sensory integration, think kinda like mild autism and you'll have the right mental picture.
For starters, our church is one great big echo chamber. I’m telling you, the squeaking of my shoes echoes in there! Now, I spent 3 months trying to teach Sonshine to say “go” back when he was almost 2 and only had 4 words. I will remind myself of those 3 months of prayer and struggle to teach him to talk every 6.7 seconds from the opening of the church doors to the pulling into my driveway.
So, would you like to join us on a trip to Mass??
We go through the same thing every Sunday. It starts outside the doors with Mom announcing “We are now going into the church, this means you need to be QUIET! Do you understand?” A rousing chorus of “Yes Ma’am” a grin from Subvet and OFF… WE…… GOOOOOOO!!
Due to sleep schedules (I work nights and the kids nap) we go to the 10AM Mass…..the most crowded one…the one where if you don’t get there early enough, you’re gonna be standing in the aisles. Well, as you can imagine, trying to get through Mass without the visual and physical barriers of the pew just isn’t going to happen so we always make sure to get there early….Plus, we need to be up close so the kids can see what’s happening. This helps them stay focused and attentive (more or less). So all in all we get to church about 30 min early. Which is just about the time that the Family Rosary starts up.
Sonshine, (at a louder than normal volume) “Look Mama! It’s JESUS Mama! YEEEEESS It’s Jesus on the Cross Mama! Jesus with Booboos on the Cross Mama!!”
Mom, (in a frantic whisper) “yes dear, now we need to be quiet and take our seats come on”
Did I mention the words ECHO CHAMBER?
Everyone, (in prayerful mumble) “Hail Mary, full of grace..”
Sonshine, (in normal speaking voice…and 5 words or so behind everyone else) “Hail Mary full of grace, it's Jesus Mama!! Jesus with BooBoos!! Blessed are thou among women Mama!! I'm saying Hail Mary Mama!! and it's Jesus and GOD on the CROSS Mama!! with BooBoos!! “
Mom, (still with that frantic whisper) “very good, now say your prayers QUIETLY please”
This continues until the rosary is finished, he’s always about 4 or 5 words behind…always with interjections…always at a volume sure to make echoes in the near empty church.
He’s even learned to cross himself now…of course he does it with his left hand (not right) and smacks himself almost hard enough to leave a mark, but still!.....
Future interview with Child Protective Services—“Ma’am, your son has bruises on his forehead, shoulders and chest…” “Well, see...um…..we’re Catholic and…..um……..”
Then Mass starts.
Very early in the Mass Father Tim blesses the children and sends them to the chapel. This is good, Mom takes both boys and we join the other kiddos in our child oriented lesson. During which my 2 sons studiously attempt to unweave the wicker on the chapel seats. Raise their hands to volunteer to read the scripture (Sonshine is –at 4 years old—4 feet tall, so I have to keep saying no….sorry…they can’t read) and generally attempt to focus on whoever the teacher is that week.
I do know that Sonshine listens, even though he doesn’t appear to. For example, one day the story was about courage. One part says that it takes courage to tell your parents when you do something you shouldn’t, such as breaking a glass. Now, all during the story the boys are..um…shall we say otherwise occupied. Generally being wiggly, noisy, and distracted.
Then we rejoin Mass at the beginning of the Eucharist (Communion).
Mom, (once again) “OK boys, we’re going back into church it’s time to be quiet. If you’re not quiet we will have to leave before it’s over. Do you hear me?”
Boys, (cheerfully, with big smiles) “Yes Ma’am”
Deep breath, quick prayer…...or two….
The congregation is usually singing as the kiddos (and this mom) come back in. We get to our pew, Subvet and I exchange thumbs-ups to say that Sugars was marginally quiet during the Homily and the boys did not succeed in destroying the chairs in the chapel….this week.
We’re half way there.
We kneel, the church gets quiet as Father Tim begins the Eucharist.
Sonshine, (LOUDLY) “Look Momma!!! It’s the Body and Blood of Jesus Momma!! YEEEESS Momma! The Body and Blood of Jesus Momma! Jesus with BooBoos!! Jesus Died Momma and God put him on the cross with Booboos Momma!!!“
Mom, “yes, now be quiet or we will leave!”
Remember 3 months of begging God to allow this child to talk???
A few moments of quiet pass during which Gator-boy (y’all better pray for my sanity once he starts talking) starts getting fidgety. Out comes Momma’s purse. Some women carry makeup and wallets in their purses….I carry……..
Church appropriate (ie, quiet) entertainment. (if ever you need such items…the calculator and tape measure work the best)
Then begins the weekly wrestling match. WWF has nothing on Mightymom vs the Hooligan Duo in the pew. Trying to teach them to kneel has been a challenge, to say the least. Usually finds me with a boy on each side of me (toy in hand) on the kneeler with a handful of the backs of their pants and pull ups. This way I can “apply gentle pressure” should they decide they don’t want to kneel anymore….
(I’ve never faced the folks who sit behind us….better not to know) I will say that since we started going to Mass, my shoulders, hips and back have gotten much stronger. (It’s all about counting your blessings, folks!)
Sonshine, (when do they learn to whisper?) “Momma! You broke the glass momma!!”
Mom, “WHAT?”
Sonshine, “YEEESS! Momma! You broke the glass and was COURAGE Momma!!”
(Oh, the story book…..got it)
Mom, “ssssssshhh, it’s time to be quiet, see Daddy’s gone to get the Body and Blood of Jesus, we have to be quiet now”
Sonshine, (even louder than before) “Have to be quiet Momma! Have to be quiet and break the glass Momma! And Jesus has Booboos Momma!!!”
Mom, “hush now or we’re gonna have to leave. “
Sonshine, (WAILS) “NO Momma!! Wanna see Jesus!! Momma Wanna see the Body and Blood of Jesus!!! PPPPLLLEEEEAAASSSSEEEE!!!!”
(Oh yeah….worst mom of the year award coming my way.)
Mom, “we’re almost done. Please just hush for a few minutes”
Sonshine, “sssshhhh Momma.”
On come the announcements….Sonshine (of course) has a comment for each picture they project on the wall to go with the announcements but by this time I’ve given up and am just trying to grab up all our stuff so we can make a quick getaway. I sincerely hope the poor guy who usually sits in front of us is hard of hearing. I figure since he doesn't bust out laughing or show signs of irritation he MUST be!!
Father Tim says those blessed words “Mass has ended, you may go in peace”
We head out the door, load the clan in the van. Subvet looks at me and says “Well, we made it through another one! Shall we stop at Sonic on our way home?”
You’d better believe it! Momma needs a treat!
Thank you Dear Lord
For these precious children
For the special encounters we have with them
For the lessons they teach us.
Thank you for their ability to talk…..even when they talk too much.
Amen.
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